


Why It's Useful Feeling Blue

by Origingirl



Series: Diamonds are Gems, Too. [1]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Blue Diamond cries a lot, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, I Made Myself Cry, Kissing, Lots of tears, Romance, Romantic Fluff, all good stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-05
Updated: 2017-01-05
Packaged: 2018-09-14 23:33:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9210254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Origingirl/pseuds/Origingirl
Summary: Takes place directly after "That Will Be All". Different people have different ways of coping with loss. Yellow Diamond realizes this, and seeks to comfort Blue in anyway possible.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Amberfigueroa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amberfigueroa/gifts).



> first time writing for SU, here we f***ing go. sry 4 any typos. literally drew this thing up in 2 hours. enjoy :3

They watched as the group of gems left the small room they were in and sighed. If Yellow could name one negative element about being a leader, it was the fact that most of the time there was little to no privacy. She shook her hand and rubbed gentle circles in the small of Blue’s back, making the azure diamond step closer and lean her head on Yellow’s shoulder.

“You don’t have to pretend, you know. Not in front of _me_ anyhow.” Blue spoke softly, wrapping her own arm around Yellow’s waist. “I heard it in your voice.”

Yellow stopped her circular tracing to pull Blue closer to her. She could always read gems so easily. “Heard what, exactly?” Yellow replied, tone dry and void of any telling emotion.

Blue laughed lightly. “The sorrow. The grief. The longing for her to still be with us.” She said, turning to meet Yellow’s gaze. “You forget, I know you better than anyone - White Diamond aside - and can tell how you’re feeling without the need for words or expressions.”

“So you can.” Yellow said, attempting to return her friends smile, which resulted in failure of the notion. “We have to move forward, Blue.” she said, tone becoming more serious than lacking any punch at all. “It is our duty - to our gems and our colonies… and especially to _ourselves.”_

“Huh?”

“I know you want to grieve, believe me I do, but the more you insist on _wallowing_ the worse you’ll feel.” Yellow said, taking Blues hands in her own. “I don’t want you making any rash decisions or overlooking something important as a result of the somber mindset you’re in now.”

Blue looked down at their intertwined hands, her lips still pursed in a frown. They stood like that for a long while, neither of their Pearls daring to break a moment like this. Eventually, Blue was the first to end the quietness that had settled upon them. “I envy you, Yellow.” She spoke softly.

Yellow brought a hand up to brush some hair away from her tear stained face. “How so?”

Blue leaned into the touch, grateful that at least Yellow saw fit to stay with her longer than necessary, seeing how her schedule was normally busier than her own. With a small sigh, she answered, “You have the ability to simply… _forget.”_ Blue said, cupping her own hand against Yellow’s stroking her thumb back and forth across her cheek. “Yet at the same time, I could _never_ bring myself to forget her, Yellow. I’m surprised you’d even suggest something like that.” She said, voice beginning to tremble on the verge of tears.

Without thinking, Yellow wrapped both arms around Blue, sighing into her long, starry-white hair. “You misunderstand, my dear. I meant ‘forget the _sorrow_ woven into the memories surrounding what happened’, not forget her altogether. I wouldn't _think_ of committing such a crime.”

“It would be a crime, wouldn't it.” Blue spoke, voice almost in a whisper. “How could anyone forget such a beautiful, loving, joyous…” Blue trailed off, sobbing a little more with each word reminding her of how amazing Pink was, and the realization that she’ll never see her again hit Blue harder than ever before. “She’s not coming back, Yellow.” Blue sobbed, allowing the tears to flow freely down her face. “She’s not coming b-back.”

“Come now, Blue.” Yellow said, pulling away from their embrace to wipe at her fresh tears. “You know I hate it when you cry.”

Blue chuckled sadly. “Only because it makes _you_ cry.”

Yellow continued to wipe Blues tears from her face until she felt a familiar wetness pooling at the bottom lids of her own eyes. “Precisely. So please, don't cry.” She said, trying her best to smile once more, and succeeding - however small and broken it was. “I’m right here, Blue.”

Blue sighed, falling back into their embrace. “I know. I’m glad.” She said, sliding her hands up Yellow’s back to place them on her shoulders. “I’m really, very glad.” They gazed at each other until Yellow couldn't stand staring at Blue’s hurt expression any longer. She slowly caressed the side of Blue’s face before sliding her hand to the back of Blue’s head and pulled her in for a chaste kiss. Blue smiled softly, bringing a hand up to administer an identical caress to Yellow’s face. They stood like that for what seemed like an eternity before pulling away. They were both smiling at one another now, even if tears still fell from their eyes. “And to answer your question from earlier,” Blue said, touching her forehead to Yellow’s. “The use of feeling ‘blue’… it’s simply how I remember her. Pink deserves to be remembered by all gems, but by us a thousand times more. If we forget her - all that she was and all that she gave - she truly will be gone forever.” She said, cradling Yellow’s head in her hands. “I tried Yellow, I really did try to only remember her fondly, but… I don’t think I’m ready to just yet.”

“And I’m not pushing you. It was never my intention to, and I apologize if it came off like that.” Yellow apologized, not wanting Blue to get any false ideas about her intentions. “I could tell you right now that it would make me feel good and relieved if we did away with the remaining quartz, this zoo, _and_ the Earth altogether.” Yellow spoke with a now firmer voice. Blue cringed at just how strongly Yellow felt about eradicating everything that ever resembled or belonged to Pink. Yellow felt this, and quickly calmed herself, not wishing to make Blue feel any worse. “However,” she added. “That course of action wouldn’t do anything for you but add to your already existing grief and pain over the entirety of the situation. I would never want that for you.”

Blue nodded, pressing Yellow even closer to herself. “Thank you, Yellow. To be honest, I was afraid you’d go behind my back and get rid of these gems, this place, everything that ever was hers.”

Yellow gasped lightly at that implication. She embraced Blue as if her diamond companion were the last thing keeping her alive at this very moment. “No. Don’t you dare think that, Blue.” She said, in a somewhat commanding voice, conveying how serious she was about this concern of Blue’s. “First of all, I’d never go behind your back and do _anything_ involving you without consulting you first. That includes our next course of action - there’s still time, as I said.”

“We couldn’t possibly relocate the entirety of the human population into the zoo, there’s just not enough space.”

“Then we’ll make space.” Yellow said, tone edging on frustration - not directed towards Blue, but towards herself for not aiding Blue in her time of need sooner. “We’ll do whatever it takes to get you on your feet again, understand?” Yellow stated more than asked an actual question, but Blue nodded nonetheless, then shook her head slightly in a playful manner. “You’re so firm once you’re set on a goal, Yellow.”

Yellow sighed before pulling away from their embrace once again. “And why shouldn’t I be? I’m serious about this plan, Blue. I meant every word and- mmph!” Yellow began to re enforce her previous statement about doing whatever it took to help Blue, when Blue herself cut her off with and abrupt, but passion-filled kiss. Yellow stumbled back a few feet before regaining her composer and returning the gesture. They’ve kissed plenty of times, but it’s been awhile since they’ve had enough alone time to kiss like _this._ Normally, it was a quick peck on the cheek after meetings or a chaste kiss on the lips to say hello or good-bye. Moments like this were rare and Yellow could tell Blue needed it now more than ever. She needed something to feel good about - something to remind her that there were still things to look forward to in their awfully long life spans. Acknowledging Blue’s current need for physical reassurance, she was not taken off guard when pulled down onto the fluffy pink pillow on the temple’s floor. Their Pearls glanced at each other and nodded before quietly exiting the room, leaving their diamonds to their own devices.

Yellow let Blue roam and prod the inside of her mouth with her tongue as much as she pleased, as did she allow Blue to stroke and caress her body to her heart's content. It was a matter of minutes before Yellow felt the warm water of Blue’s fresh tears wash over her own cheeks. Yellow straddled Blue’s hips in order to bring both her hands up to cradle Blue’s face, wiping each and every tear as they fell from those beautiful blue eyes Yellow adored so much. Blue sighed with contentment at the touches, welcoming all distractions to deter her mind from the sadness of their shared loss. One of Yellow’ hands moved down to slowly stroke the outer edges of Blue’s gem on her chest. She arched slightly off the pink, fluffy pillow and failed to silence the small moan of pleasure that escaped past her lips. Yellow took this opportunity to trail small kisses and bites up and down Blue’s now exposed neck, which made Blue release more and more sounds of pleasure. They moved so that Blue could wrap her legs around Yellow’s waist, all the while never breaking contact be it Yellow’s mouth on Blue’s or Blue’s neck. At this point, Yellow was returning every kiss and every caress tenfold of what she received from her diamond companion, wanting Blue to know through not just words how valued and loved she was, and how Yellow herself felt the same way even if she didn’t outwardly show it.

When either of them had the stamina to pull away, Blue gazed at Yellow with all of her feelings bared and out in the open. Through this gaze, Yellow saw how wounded Blue _truly_ was, and couldn’t help but to let a few of her own tears to fall from her eyes.

“It hurts, Yellow.” Blue said, her voice a broken whisper and her face contorted with misery and hopelessness. “It really, _really_ hurts."

Yellow hated it. She hated how Blue couldn’t just _get over it_ so she’d stop feeling this way, and at the same time she was willing to leave Blue to sit in sorrow as long as she needed. She felt torn for the first time in a long time and longed for Blue’s joyful smile and kind eyes because _damn_ she felt as hopeless as Blue looked right now.

“I know there’s nothing we can do, you think I _don’t_ know this? I wish I could move on after all this time has passed, but- mmph!” Blue silently exclaimed as she was cut off by Yellow smothering her with a deep kiss, Yellow dismissing any means of a conversation, already knowing what Blue was trying to say but she didn’t care anymore. Blue had a different way of doing things and she’s _fine_ with that. She only wishes Blue wouldn’t beat herself up about something out of her control. Yellow kissed harder, deeper, and with more haste the more these discouraging and annoying thoughts intruded her mind. Blue noticed the change in pace, but didn’t mind at all knowing how high-strung Yellow could get in moments like this. They enjoyed themselves for as long as the time that remained allowed, then slowly and unwillingly began to disentangle themselves. Though they were the Diamond Authority and could do whatever they please most of the time, they did have colonies to get back to and courts to host - _duties_ to perform, simply put.

As soon as they both were able to stand, Yellow immediately pushed Blue back against the nearest pink pillar to try and pry just a few more kisses out of this moment. The surprised Blue yelped at the abrupt action, but smiled against Yellow’s lips, emitting a small laugh. Yellow pulled away and smiled. “There’s my beautiful Blue.”

The complement only made Blue laugh more, giving a playful peck to her companion’s cheek. “I never left.” She said, taking Yellow’s hands in her own.

Yellow hummed with contentment, giving Blue’s hands a small squeeze. “It seemed like it for a while. I just want you to be happy, Blue. You think Pink would want to see you in tears every day?”

Blue shook her head, intertwining their fingers. “No, she wouldn’t.” Blue said, looking at Yellow with that soft smile still perched on her lips. “If anything, she’d scold me and tell me how maladroit I’m being, and how I should worry not about her. Then proceed to give me a playful punch on the shoulder."

Yellow nodded, and grinned at the thought. “That does sound like something she’d say.”

Blue was about to reply when she heard a _swoosh_ , and both Yellow’s as well as her own eyes were directed towards the large door to the room they were in opening. Both their Pearls walked forwards, Yellow’s Pearl clearing her voice nervously. “My Diamond, i-it seemed to have quieted down, and we were just checking to s-see if everything was alright?” She asked, voice meek and skittish.

Yellow turned to face Blue and gave her companion a quick nod before facing both her and Blue’s Pearl. “We’re just fine, Pearl. Go, both of you, to prepare our vessels for departure.”

“Yes, My Diamond.” They both spoke in unison, then turned to follow the order they’ve received.

Once the door closed, Yellow turned back to Blue and smiled. “No more tears, I see.”

Blue laughed and moved to embrace Yellow. “For now, anyways.” She said, then pulled away, allowing her hand to linger on Yellow’s shoulder.

“I miss her, too. We’ll always miss her, but we need to think fondly of her - remember all the good she brought, not the grief of the loss itself.”

“I know.” Blue said, removing her hand from Yellow’s shoulder to re-position her veil. “Thank you, Yellow. And… don’t think for a minute I don’t care for you or love you less than Pink or White.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” Yellow said.

Blue nodded and was about to walk to the door, but Yellow grabbed the sides of Blue’s veil and pulled her in for one last love-infused kiss. “Call when you need me, Blue. I’ll always answer.”

Blue’s smile widened and for the first time in a while looked like something other than a half-smile or a broken one. “I know you will.”

**Author's Note:**

> Though also a Transformers, Avengers, Dragon Ball, and Devil Lady fan, I too was not immune to the latest episode of this magnificent cartoon. (the feelz are sucking me in plz send help) (also gifted to amber cos she's basically one of the few hard-core diamond shippers i know on tumblr) (...love you, amber.....) (...........okie bye)


End file.
